We don’t see Beyonce much anymore, but the good news is she’s got a new clothing line to promote these days, so the sexy MILF is back doing press again — like this Flashgirls-themed photoshoot for the latest issue of Elle. And don’t get me wrong, it’s not a bad idea for a shoot, but if Beyonce really wanted to reenact a dance movie, why not Showgirls? Now that was a great film.
CELEBRITIES > Beyonce Knowles
I don’t do many posts on Beyonce anymore these days, but every once in a while she likes to remind us all that she’s still one of the hottest MILFs out there. And it’s because she’s capable of showing up out of nowhere like this to drop some serious cleavage at some random concert event in Brooklyn. So enjoy, because this is going to have to tide us all over until the next time we see her. I figure it ought to be enough to last me at least the next 30-45 seconds, anyway.
I barely do posts on Beyonce anymore these days now that she’s too busy with trivial things like “parenting” and “making new records” and not more important stuff like going to the beach 5 days a week or doing bikini yoga in the park. But luckily, she showed up to the MET Ball last night in a see-through dress hot enough to last me through the rest of 2015, or whenever we finally see this serious MILF next. Yow.
I haven’t done a post on Beyonce in forever, but that’ll change real fast if she keeps doing sexy photoshoots like this one for Out Magazine. Not to nitpick or anything though, but it’s my professional opinion that her handbra technique could use some work. I’m guessing she’s just a little rusty these days. But I’d be more than happy to give her a quick refresher course. Just FYI, I’m a very hands-on teacher.
OK, so nevermind. Apparently something worth mentioning actually did happen at the 56th annual Grammys last night: music’s newest MILF Beyonce opened the show with one hell of a booty-shaking performance. I’ve got the video for everybody who missed it below, but if you ask me, the pictures are actually even better. See, now you don’t have to keep pausing and squinting through all that dry ice. Also, you don’t have to mute the pictures. You’re welcome.
I haven’t done a Beyonce post in ages, but here she is at the release party for her new self titled “Visual Album” in a super hot futuristic outfit. Damn, that is one sweet backside pic. If she keeps dressing like this, I might actually start listening to her music. Anyway, hopefully there will be more photos like this come.
Now that Beyonce‘s officially a MILF, it was just a matter of time before we got to see her in a bikini photoshoot. It must be some celebrity rite of passage, like buying a massive house you’ll never use or killing a poor person because you can. Anyway, here’s Beyonce paying her dues for H&M, so enjoy these. Because if you ever get the chance to see Beyonce in a bikini up-close, it’s because you’re about to be hunted on her private island, not because you won the lottery like Jay-Z’s manager told you.
I didn’t watch her halftime show at the Super Bowl, because I was busy attending to more important matters — like waging war against my liver — but I’m glad to see the Beyonce MILF tour is in full effect. And here she is at its latest stop, the New York premiere of something called Beyonce: Life Is But A Dream. Which is apparently some new HBO documentary about her kick-ass life. We get it: you’re insanely rich, famous and hot, and this is the closest any of us will ever get to you. But if she’s going to rub it in our faces, at least she did it with cleavage.
Wow, after checking out these pictures of Beyonce in GQ, I’m pretty sure we missed a serious contender for MILF of the Year. Where was this all of 2012? Anyway, I don’t really get the point of the football helmet or poses, but I’d sure love to play a little two-hand touch with Beyonce. And since I’m pretty sure Jay-Z could buy this site 10 times over and turn it into a blog about adult diapers, by two-hand touch, I mean play patty-cake with Beyonce and their wonderful kid. Obviously.
I’ve never found pregnant chicks very sexy, at least not until Hilary Duff got all knocked up and gorgeous in her sexy booty shots, but I’ve always had a thing for sweet big pregnant lady breasts. Here’s Beyonce giving us a sneak peek at what sort of sexy transformation we can expect from those tasty sweater mounds of hers. That Jay-Z character is going to have a fun few months. Lucky bastard. Mega-rich rap stars get all the breaks. Anyhow, so far I like the way this pregnancy is shaping up.
You would think that pictures of Beyonce in overalls would be completely awful, and you’d be right on most days, but today seems to be special. Here she is flashing more than just a smile in her sexy one piece. Sideboob shots can sometimes be sort of weird looking, like a fat dude on a bicycle, but these are looking good. I wouldn’t have expected this kind of thing from Beyonce, she’s normally so careful, she must be slipping in her old age. I like it.
Here’s Beyonce filming some scenes for an upcoming video of hers in a weird yellow outfit, I’ll never understand these kind of get ups. Anyhow, she’s showing off her nice thick thighs so it’s not all that bad. She’s got a pretty solid base there, she looks like she’d be tough to push over. Maybe she should join one of those lingerie football teams, I’m sure they can use a tough linebacker.