I was gonna say that it seems a little early for Arianny Celeste to be putting out a 2016 calendar, considering it’s still only July. But then I saw the pictures, and you know what? I take it all back. Because they’re so hot, I’m going to want to spend a whole lot more than 12 months staring at these. So we might as well get started now. Enjoy.
CELEBRITIES > Arianny Celeste
It’s been a long time since we’ve gotten any new bikini goodness from instant pants fire Deborah Mace, so I figured I should probably do a little research and check out what the French hottie’s been up to lately. And as far as I can tell from
creeping studying her Instagram, Deborah’s been traveling the world taking insanely hot selfies. So, in other words, nothing she couldn’t do from the comfort of home. Or my mom’s basement. I’m just saying, think about it. Sightseeing’s overrated. And besides, the only sight I’m interested in seeing more of is Deborah in a bikini.
Here’s Victoria’s Secret Angel and smoking hot Brit Lily Donaldson on the beach for her latest bikini shoot. And I know that Lily’s coconuts aren’t quite as big as some of her fellow Victoria’s Secret models, but if you ask me, she makes up for it with a bikini body that’s so hot, it could melt my pants region in 6 seconds or less. Enjoy.
We’ve still got another few months to go until Bella Thorne turns 18 (2 and a half to be exact, but who’s counting?). So do your best to ignore these shots of her at Just Jared’s Summer Bash pool party. Because I’m no lawyer, but I’m pretty sure that saying you took your pants off because your air conditioner is broken isn’t going to hold up in court.
Normally, I’d get upset that a hottie as fine as Kaitlynn Carter here was dating a douche like Brody Jenner, but I’m trying to look on the bright side. And if Kaitlynn wasn’t dating a Jenner, I doubt the paparazzi would be following her to the beach and getting us these killer bikini pictures. I just wish she wasn’t dating the wrong Jenner. Because these shots would be even better if she was dating Kendall instead, don’t you think?
In case you forgot who this Devin Brugman hottie is, don’t worry, I needed a quick refresher too — and I’m not just talking about the cold shower I had to take to be able to get through the rest of this post. See, Devin’s a professional Instagram model and fellow bikini blogger. Now I know that might sound crazy or impossible, considering she’s smoking hot and not allergic to fresh air or the sun, but hey, I guess there’s always a first time for everything. Yes, even a busty, tanned blogger.
Ever since her show got cancelled, there’s been a serious drought of Annalynne McCord bikini pictures. In fact, it got so bad, I considered applying for government assistance. But luckily, it didn’t have to come to that, because Annalynne and her friends hit the beach in Cancun. And it’s just in time too. Because for some reason, the government apparently doesn’t consider a lack of bikini pictures from a B-list hottie a “major national crisis.” Go figure.
Every time I think we’ve seen the last of Eva Longoria, the paps always seem to show up with another set of bikini pictures from the former Desperate Housewife. And sure, that booty of hers definitely looks like it’s seen better days, but I can’t think of a much better way for Evan to spend her retirement than hanging out on yachts showering for paparazzi with zoom lenses. Well, unless she wants to start hanging out at my place. I’d better fill up the kiddie pool on the front lawn just in case.
Thanks to killer photoshoots like this, Arianny Celeste has been my #1 favorite Octagon Girl for a while now. But after this latest set of bikini pictures, I’m starting to think that maybe it’s time Arianny left the UFC and moved on to bigger and better gigs. You know, like filming a sex tape with a certain moderately famous blogger. …Stop laughing, that wasn’t supposed to be a joke.
I haven’t done a ton of posts on Zoe Kravitz, but I’m pretty sure at this point we can go ahead and stop referring to her as Lenny’s daughter. Because a bikini body this good deserves attention no matter who she’s related to. And if Zoe keeps hitting the beach looking like this, I guarantee that pretty soon she’ll be more famous than her dad ever was.
Good news: my favorite Swiss model/MILF Michelle Hunziker is back at the beach and her booty’s looking better than ever. (Trust me, I spent a few hours double-checking.) Anyway, sorry for the little brat ruining some of these shots… That’s the problem with these MILFs, they’ve always got their kids with them, for some weird reason. I mean, c’mon, how’s a pervert supposed to enjoy her sexy mom bikini body like this? It’s just inconsiderate, if you ask me. So here’s hoping next time Michelle is able to ditch the kids and get some much needed alone time with the paps and their cameras.
I can’t think of a much better way to end another long work week than with pictures of a smoking hot model in a bikini, so here’s SI bombshell Hannah Davis to help us kick off another glorious summer weekend. So enjoy, and just remember to stay hydrated, because these pictures are liable to have you feeling pretty overheated if you’re not careful.
Apparently the UFC held another one of their pool parties in Las Vegas to celebrate Fight Week, and I guess Arianny Celeste and Brittney Palmer were busy, because instead, only the B squad showed up. But I have to say, I’m pretty impressed by Chrissy Blair and Vanessa Hanson here. Sure, they may be the UFC’s second-string ring girls, but you know, with a little hard work, dedication and more smoking hot bikini pictures, these two could work their way up my UFC hottie rankings in no time.
I still don’t buy that Charlotte McKinney‘s a real model, and not just some Playboy wannabe who got lucky, but there’s no denying we’ve been getting some solid bikini photoshoots from her lately. First for Men’s Health, and now this one from GQ. But if you ask me, I still say those giant funbags of Charlotte’s belong in Playboy. Here’s hoping she’s doing them next…