Hollywoodtuna » Paris Hilton

Paris Hilton Actually Makes My Pants Tight

I haven’t done a post on Paris Hilton in a very long time, a while ago I had a team of nerds set up some fancy Hilton Filters and Paris Blockers on my computer to keep her out. Apparently these pictures of her outside the Letterman studios in a sexy blue dress were just too hot and somehow managed to make it through my firewalls. I hate myself for saying this, but she actually does look pretty good. Our time apart has been good to her. This is a new low.

Photos: Flynet

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Paris Hilton’s Magical Boobies Don’t Fool Me

I’ve been doing my best not to post any pictures of Paris Hilton, mostly because she’s useless, but also because she’s boring as balls these days and my site doesn’t need any viruses. I’ve been so good, she hasn’t been on the site since June. Damn it! Here she is going somewhere and doing something I don’t care about, but she’s showing off some pretty magical cleavage. I’m sorry but boobs are boobs, it’s just business. Enjoy.

Photos: WENN.com, SplashNewsOnline

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Paris Hilton In Her Magical Push Up Bra and Knee Highs

It’s been reported that Paris Hilton and her boyfriend broke up so I guess she decided to head out on the town and get some breakup revenge by wearing her magical push up bra and some knee highs. I’ve always been a fan of knee highs. Girls used to wear them back in the day and you knew the one’s that did were easy. So it’s no surprise Paris owns a pair. Only difference is back in the day, you didn’t have to worry about STDs but ever since the Paris invasion, you can’t go anywhere without wearing a condom. Thanks. I’ve got one on right now. Safety first.

more pictures of Paris Hilton here

Photos: Flynet, PacificCoastNews

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Paris Hilton’s Magical Boobies Try To Boost Up Ratings

I’m pretty sure nobody saw Paris Hilton on Letterman last night because they were too busy watching Conan take over the ‘Tonight Show’, she was on promoting her new BFF show which I’m sure will suck balls. Anyhow, here she is arriving at the studio with her on again off again skinny girl cleavage. Cleavage is weird, where does it go when you’re naked? Come to think of it, where does your lap go when you stand up?

more pictures of Paris Hilton here

Photos: Flynet

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Paris Hilton Swimsuit Pictures

Here’s Paris Hilton trying her best to look sexy while posing in a swimsuit for her new hair products line. Unfortunately, it kind of works… As much as I hate Paris and think she’s even more useless than old socks, occasionally she convinces me otherwise. Sorry.

Photos: PacificCoastNews

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Paris Hilton Flashes Her Panties

Paris Hilton is up to her old tricks again, here she is at the DSquared2 Grand Opening Party that I wasn’t invited to, flashing her little panties to the cameras. I’m getting a little sick of this game, we’ve all seen this garbage before, I’m pretty sure most of us could pick Paris’ vagina out of a police line up. I don’t know what it did but they should throw the book at that thing.

21 more pictures of Paris Hilton here

Photos: Flynet

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Paris Hilton Swimsuit Pictures

Here’s Paris Hilton in her slutty little swimsuit with her new boyfriend lounging around the pool at the Hotel Du Cap in Anitbes near Cannes the other day. Alright so that’s not her boyfriend but I think she should at least give the old guy a chance, I’m sure he could introduce her to all kinds of sexually transmitted diseases she’s only ever read about in history books or heard about in the stories her grandmother used to tell her.

17 more pictures of Paris Hilton here

Photos: Flynet

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Paris Hilton Should Get A Boob Job Already

I don’t know what’s going on with Paris Hilton’s boobs anymore, sometime they’re huge sometimes they look like a couple of raisins on a bread board. Here they are at their absolute biggest, it must almost be that time of the month, do tits still get bigger during a chick’s period or am I way off? In any case, Paris should just bite the bullet and get some nice fake tits already and we can all get on with our lives.

Photos: PacificCoastNews

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Paris Hilton Is A Futuristic Sl%t

Here’s Paris Hilton in some futuristic outfit for a photoshoot. Besides the wrap covering her lower half, the rest of her looks pretty hot. Unfortunately for her (not us), Paris will be forgotten in the future. I wonder if sluts will have STDs in the year 2999? Not that it matters since we’ll all be bug food…. hmmm maybe not Paris she’s more of a pesticide.

24 more pictures of Paris Hilton here

Photos: Fame

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Rotten Tuna: Paris Hilton And Kathy Griffin’s Pantie Flash

I have no clue why Paris Hilton and Kathy Griffin are hanging together but if the thought of Paris Hilton makes you cringe I can’t image how you feel about seeing Kathy’s panties. I know it’s wrong of me to pollute your monitors with these pics but I had to. Sometimes you’ve got to see crap to appreciate the finer things in life like this.

19 more pictures of Paris Hilton here

Photos: Fame

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Paris Hilton Is Green And Ugly

Paris Hilton was in Las Vegas yesterday celebrating St Patrick’s day at some club with her latest douche. When I think of chicks celebrating St Patrick’s day in Vegas I don’t picture them dressed in some designer outfit wearing a tiara, unless you happen to be at a strip club. In which case I picture them with shamrocks taped over their nipples chasing a midget dressed as a leprechaun around the club while someone does something dirty involving a Shillelagh.

12 more pictures of Paris Hilton here

Photos: Flynet

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Paris Hilton With Her Animal Twin

Here’s Paris Hilton showing us once again how much likes cocks… Cockatoos that is. Ha! See what I did there? Comedy gold. I’m pretty sure that’s not even a Cockatoo but for the sake of this post let’s just say it is. I would have preferred to see a little less bird and a little more ass but I’m not the one in charge of the staged vacation pictures. They really do look alike, they share the same beak. Can birds get STD’s?

13 more pictures of Paris Hilton here

Photos: Flynet

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Paris Hilton Bikini Pictures

Warning! Crabs in the ocean! Here’s Paris Hilton in Maui, Hawaii at the beach with her new boy toy. I don’t understand why Paris is covering up her lower half with that wrap, but she must be hiding something… Too much partying has made her ass turn to mush? Yes, it happens to skinny chicks too. Until she removes it, this really can’t be considered an authentic bikini moment.

25 more pictures of Paris Hilton here

Photos: Flynet, PacificCoastNews

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Rotten Tuna: Paris Hilton And Nicole Richie

I have no idea if Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie are still friends, but I doubt it because there no such thing as ‘true friendship’ when you live in Hollywood. However, one thing is for sure, Nicole still seems to be following Paris’ footsteps when it comes to personal style… And that’s a shame. What’s more of a shame is that these retarded hippie head bands and dresses are actually catching on. I like my girls in tight clothes and shaven! I apologize for reuniting these two losers, but at least it’s just for a Rotten Tuna post and not a stupid reality show.

17 more pictures of Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie here

Photos: Flynet

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