I’ve always thought Nicole Scherzinger had a bright future as a professional hot nobody. So I’m glad to see she finally gave up on her boring music career to dedicate herself to living that Instagram life full-time. Here she is showing off her cleavage-in-the-car skills, her bikini-sunset skills and her pretend-modeling-shoot skills. Like I said, she’s a total pro at this already!
CELEBRITIES > Nicole Scherzinger
For years, I’ve been saying that Nicole Scherzinger should give up her music career or hosting career or… whatever it is she does for work right now and just dedicate her life to being a full-time hot nobody. It just makes so much sense. Not only is she a total natural at hanging out in a bikini all day, but she’s also a pro at “working out” in leggings for the cameras. What more do you need? Well, maybe a blogger/assistant to take pictures with his phone. But otherwise, she’s all set.
If you can ignore the lucky bastard attempting to ruin it with his terrible moves, this has to be one of the best Snapchat videos I’ve seen in weeks. (Well, not counting anything Bella Thorne‘s done.) But honestly, this is why I keep saying that Nicole Scherzinger needs to give up on her music career once and for all and just dedicate her life to being a professional hot nobody. It’s so obvious it’s what she was meant to do.
I keep telling you guys that Nicole Scherzinger is in the middle of some kind of major hotness comeback right now. I’m pretty sure this is our third post in under two weeks. And it’s all thanks to social media. If you ask me, more
washed-up former hotties should try it. The way I see it, it’s way easier to make an Instagram profile than get yourself on a reality show. Plus, it cuts out the middleman. This way, the cleavage goes straight to the fans. No filter. Enjoy.
According to my sources, the 2017 Billboard Music Awards were held in Vegas last night, and apparently Nicole Scherzinger‘s recent Instagram modeling worked. Because apparently she’s still considered famous enough to score an invite and a picture with fellow ’90s hottie Gwen Stefani. So enjoy the throwback fantasy everybody.
I haven’t really been keeping up with Nicole Scherzinger much lately, so I’m not really sure what my favorite former Pussycat Doll has been doing for work these days. But I guess her 15 minutes must be running out or something, because she’s turned to the one place every former hottie goes to try to stay relevant: Instagram. I guess she’s a professional Insta-hottie now? And yeah, if you ask me, this definitely ought to extend her 15 minutes at least another 30, 45 seconds. Yow!
I don’t know what this “One For The Boys Fashion Ball” is, but I don’t really care — all that matters is my former favorite Pussycat Doll and future ex-wife Nicole Scherzinger showed up, and she was looking white hot. We don’t get to see Nicole as much as I’d like anymore, and I’m determined to enjoy the last of her 15 minutes of fame 30-45 seconds at a time.
According to my sources, Nicole Scherzinger showed up to the 2016 MusiCares Person Of The Year Awards over the weekend to honor Lionel Richie, but forget that. Right now, I’d like to honor the true unsung heroes here: the person that invited my former favorite Pussycat Doll to this thing, and whoever’s responsible for dressing the hottie in this cleavage and leg-bearing outfit. Bravo! Now take a bow. You guys earned it.
For whatever reason, we don’t seem to see my former favorite Pussycat Doll Nicole Scherzinger around much these days. But I guess she’s just been busy, because she hasn’t been returning any of my marriage proposals or offers to go motorboating either. She did show up to opening night at Jennifer Lopez’s Vegas show though, looking hot as ever, so here’s hoping for a major hotness comeback for Nicole. And I’d be more than happy to sign up to help out, if she’s looking for sponsors. Or photographers.
I know we don’t see Nicole Scherzinger around as much as we used to, so it’s been a while, but I don’t remember her face looking this weird last time. Then again, maybe I was just too busy focusing on her other, more talented body parts. And the good news is, I can still do that here thanks to the cleavage she’s rocking. So at least these pictures aren’t a total bust.
Here’s my favorite former Pussycat Doll Nicole Scherzinger in LA for something called the Celebrity Dance Challenge. And I have no clue what that is, but I’m hoping that when it’s Nicole’s turn, her challenge will be to successfully twerk on a blogger. Now that’d be a real test of her dancing skills, because I don’t think anyone’s ever done it before. Mostly because no one’s ever tried, but hey, that would just make it even more impressive, right?
Looks like Nicole Scherzinger‘s bikini vacation is unfortunately over, unless she’s planning on hitting a few hotel pools while she’s in New York. (Fingers crossed.) But luckily, Nicole’s just as hot even when she’s wearing clothes. Although I bet my favorite former Pussycat Doll would be an instant pants fire in a garbage bag. I’d just prefer she sticks to bikinis from now on, if it’s all the same to her.
Here’s my favorite honorary busty Brit Nicole Scherzinger at the London Boat Show, which is pretty exciting news, because agreeing to appear at a boat show is just one step away from agreeing to hook up with a blogger on the C-list hottie career ladder. So here’s Nicole launching something called the Sunseeker Predator and while I’ve never been a big boat guy, after seeing these pictures, I’d love to take her out for a test motorboat. Just to be clear, I’m not talking about the boat.
Here’s Nicole Scherzinger out in London doing what she does best: giving me a serious pants fire from across the Atlantic. Only this time, instead of putting on one of her patented cleavage shows, Nicole’s got my favorite set of ex-pat funbags stuffed into a tight shirt. Although from the looks of it, maybe not for much longer. I’m telling you guys, this shirt is fighting a losing battle. And I just hope there’s still cameras around when it finally breaks.