Here’s teenage troublemaker Bella Thorne out with that dirty old man she’s dating, and I just don’t get it. I would’ve figured Chris Hansen would’ve showed up by now. Unless, between this dress and that pool party, it’s all some kind of dirty trick to get me to write something that’ll land me on a government watch list. Well, I’m not falling for it. I’m not that dumb. …Stop laughing, that wasn’t the punchline. Ah, screw you guys. Let’s all just forget it and move on.