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Christina Aguilera’s Cleavage Is Influential

April 24th, 2013

In case you hadn’t noticed, I haven’t done a post on Christina Aguilera in a long time. Mainly because I just don’t find her that hot anymore now. But I guess somebody out there still does, because she was invited to Time Magazine‘s Gala for the 100 Most Influential People in the World. I’m not really sure what Christina was doing on the list, but I figure it’s got to be for that cleavage of hers. I know it certainly used to inspire me.

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Photos: WENN.com

Christina Aguilera Is Not Only Chunky, She’s Now Ugly

November 19th, 2012

We’ve got even more pictures from the American Music Awards, they’re the gift that keeps on giving. That is, assuming you were hoping to see Christina Aguilera doing her best to pretend that she still looks hot and skinny. I know I’ve been rough on Christina lately, but I call ‘em like I see ‘em. And all I see here is some formerly hot chick with a fake tan hogging the red carpet. Next!

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Photos: WENN.com

Christina Aguilera Shows Off Her Big Fat Booty

November 6th, 2012

We had some pictures of Kelly Ripa dressed up as Christina Aguilera for Halloween earlier today, and after looking at these pictures of the real Christina, I gotta say, I think Kelly wore it better. Christina could fit the whole solar system on those pants.

Photos: PacificCoastNews

Christina Aguilera’s Scary New Hairdo

October 15th, 2012

Here’s Christina Aguilera showing off her new bad dye job at some fall fair. Somebody ought to tell Christina that Halloween is still a few weeks away. But maybe she just wanted to make sure nobody mistook her for the prize-winning largest pumpkin. So I guess it worked.

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Photos: WENN.com

Christina Aguilera Is Fat Drunken Slob

October 1st, 2012

Here is Christina Aguilera getting some help walking as she leaves a restaurant and as you can see she is either hammered or just way to fat to stand up on her own. I’m going to go with both! On the bright side, being chunky helps reduce hangovers since alcohol feeds off of blubber. I don’t know if that is a scientific fact, but it sounds about right.

» view all 18 photos

Photos: WENN.com,PacificCoastNews

Christina Aguilera Is The New Jessica Simpson

September 17th, 2012

Just when I thought Christina Aguilera had started to lose some of that post-divorce weight she put on, now this? I know she was getting big before, but she looks downright huge in these pictures from the 2012 NCLR ALMA Awards. What happened? She’s even bigger than Jessica Simpson now. Whatever it is, Christina needs to get this under control. And fast. All these fluctuations are bad for my health.

» view all 35 photos

Photos: WENN.com

Christina Aguilera’s Wobbly Cleavage

April 18th, 2012

It looks to me like Christina Aguilera has started to lose a little of that post divorce weight she put on. It’s about time. As much as I loved her new big fat chick boobies, I much prefer my hotties on the slender side. Here she is looking like she’s having a little trouble focusing on putting one foot in front of the other while out on the town. I like it. Drunk girls with big breasts stuffed into a tight little dress are kind of my thing. Nicely done.

Photos: PacificCoastNews

Christina Aguilera’s Booty Is Sick!

December 5th, 2011

I knew this moment was going to come sooner or later, Christina Aguilera has been packing on the pounds for months and months now, I’ve been dreading it and trying to prepare myself for it… But nothing could have prepared me for this. Here she is with her massive posterior stretching out an unfortunate pair of pants while out with the kid over the weekend. I think I just burped up a little of last night’s dinner. This is just not good for anyone. She’s got an ass like a football player. Yikes.

Christina Aguilera When She Was Dirrty And Tight

Photos: WENN.com

XXX-Large-Tina Shows Off The Caboose

November 9th, 2011

It would seem that all my once favorite popstars have been getting all fat and gross lately, mostly because they’re pregnant and that’s how it works, but what’s Christina Aguilera’s excuse. Here she is showing off her extra large booty on the red carpet last night. I wouldn’t even call this a booty anymore, this is an extra large ass. Sick. There’s ‘Bootylicious’ and then there’s ‘BootydisgustingIpukedinmymouthalittle’… I’d categorize this under the latter. Not good. Don’t even get me started on her rotten face.

more pictures of Christina Aguilera here

Photos: WENN.com

Christina Aguilera Is XXX-Large

October 10th, 2011

Christina Aguilera has been trying to convince us that she’s not getting fat for months now, you’re not fooling anybody lady, but it seems that stuffing her rolls into multiple layers of heavy duty Spanx just isn’t going to cut it anymore. Here she is at the Michael Jackson tribute concert over the weekend looking absolutely disgusting. That wig’s not covering up enough of her fat face. She looks like a blonde Snooki, oh god, I just threw up a bit. I’ve seen this look before…. On a tranny who offered me an HJ in a parking lot once. Sick!

Photos: WENN.com

Christina Aguilera’s Sweet Tanned Cleavage

June 17th, 2011

I don’t know anyone who watches The Voice, but judging from these screencaps I’m going to say that it looks like a really good show. Here’s Christina Aguilera dropping some serious cleavage in her judges chair. I like it a lot. The fake hair, the fake tan and the fat breast all go really well together. She reminds me of pretty much every stripper I’ve ever met in my life. What can I get for twenty dollars?

more pictures of Christina Aguilera here

Christina Aguilera Thunder Thighs In Hot Pants

June 8th, 2011

I’ve never actually seen it, but from what I’m hearing Christina Aguilera’s new show The Voice isn’t doing all that badly in the ratings. So I’m a little confused as to why the producers thought it would be a good idea to squeeze Christina’s chunky thighs into some hot pants and parade them around on stage like you would a cow at a cattle auction. We’re not looking for a good brisket here. We know she’s put on weight, so cover up the thunder thighs and accentuate her new big chesticles in a low cut top and get on with the show. It just seems like common sense to me.

Christina Aguilera Hides Her Chubcakes

May 27th, 2011

Here’s Christina Aguilera and her tasty chubcakes looking as happy as can be while signing autographs for middle aged men the other day. Cheer up lady. Actually now I’m kind of sad, I just realized the majority of the shots I’ve got are of her weird clown make up and not her fat cleavage. It seems like such a waste, like when strippers do that first dance with their clothes on… Who the hell wants to see that?

Photos: PacificCoastNews, WENN.com, Fame

Christina Aguilera’s Cleavage Needs Work

May 17th, 2011

I’m not sure if it’s just me, I can’t be the only one, but Christina Aguilera is not aging well at all. Here she is at some NBC party yesterday looking like she’s eaten some bad shellfish or something. Gross. I like that she’s wearing a nice low cut dress, even if we can’t see any real cleavage, but that face has got to go. Enough with the clown makeup. It’s been a good run, but sadly I think that Xtina’s best days are behind her.