I don’t go on Facebook much anymore, it’s basically nothing but relatives and old weirdos you used to go to school with. (And besides, all the young hotties are posting their bikini shots on Snapchat these days.) But then I remembered that Britney Spears is a mom, and moms still love Facebook. Which explains why Britney posted this bikini picture on there. And hey, if Britney keeps this up, I might have to start logging on more often. Yum.
CELEBRITIES > Bikinis
When I heard Britney Spears had landed on the cover of V Magazine‘s Spring 2016 double issue, I’m not gonna lie, I was hoping the pictures would be a little more exciting than this. But I guess Britney’s not exactly in her prime anymore, and also, most magazine don’t tend to do full-frontal nudity on their covers. Oh well. That’s why I keep saying somebody needs to hire me to run one of these things, but so far, no takers. And all these great ideas just keep going to waste. What a shame.
Britney Spears attempted to bring some of her old school hotness to the 2015 MTV Video Music Awards and somewhat succeed. Sure she’s no longer in her prime and her best days are far behind her, but for a MILF she managed to give her loyal male fans something to look at. Job well done.
Apparently the Teen Choice Awards were held in LA last night, which I didn’t watch because, despite the fact that I still live in my mom’s basement, I’m a full-grown adult. But according to my sources, Britney Spears won the Style Icon Award, and I’ve gotta say, I was a little surprised by that, considering she dresses like a white trash soccer mom 90% of the time… But after seeing this cleavage show she put on last night, it looks like Britney’s style has gotten much better lately. So nevermind.
According to my well-connected sources, Britney Spears got a haircut or something, and I guess apparently that’s considered big news. But personally, I think everyone’s missing the real story here — that Britney’s putting on one hell of an impressive leg show for a soccer mom with two kids. So enjoy, and stay tuned for any important new developments, like Britney changing into a pair of Daisy Dukes. Fingers crosssed.
In case you forgot, my favorite booty in the music business Iggy Azalea and my favorite white trash MILF Britney Spears did a song together, which I guess is why they also showed up to the Billboard Music Awards together last night too. But if they’re serious about promoting this thing properly, it’s going to take more than just a mediocre red carpet lesbian fantasy. How about a viral video where the two leg wrestle in bikinis? If a thing’s worth doing, it’s worth doing right. I’ll go get my camera.
According to my sources, Britney Spears and Iggy Azalea are shooting a music video for their new song “Pretty Girls” here, and maybe it’s just me, but that doesn’t sound right. I mean, don’t get me wrong, Britney’s still my favorite white trash MILF and Iggy’s got one of the best booties in the music business, but I don’t know how “pretty” either of them are looking here. Oh well. I’ll still watch the video on mute when it comes out. And maybe they can fix those rolls in post. Special effects have come a long way these days.
As a professional blogger, I’ve been covering Britney Spears for pretty much my entire career, from her hot early days, to her crazy days, to her recent semi-hotness comeback. After seeing her on this latest Women’s Health cover though, I think I’ve finally realized the one thing that Britney needs to look her best these days. No, I don’t mean a bikini. I mean Photoshop. So keep up the good work, photo editors! We’re all counting on you.
Because apparently Britney Spears‘ comeback attempt also includes starting a lingerie collection in Poland, here she is launching it at the opening of a new store in Warsaw. There’s so much about these pictures that I don’t understand, like why Britney’s in a Polish mall flanked by a bunch of hot models, but most of all, why she’s the only one not wearing lingerie here. Actually, scratch that. I’m not going to complain about getting to see 8 hot young models in lingerie instead of one mom with two kids. And judging from the last few posts of hers we’ve seen, if anything, I’m pretty sure Britney did us a favor. So enjoy.
You guys know that I’ve been a big supporter of Britney Spears‘ recent comeback attempt. And it’s not because I’m a nice guy or a big believer in second chances or any of that crap. I just find Hot Britney way more fun to do posts on than Crazy Britney. Case in point: here she is taking a night off from her Vegas show to put on a solid cleavage show for all of us at Elton John’s Oscar party. Now that’s the type of good behavior we should be encouraging. So enjoy.
Say what you want about the rest of her, but Britney Spears has always had a great booty. It’s one of the things that helped keep her in the business for so long — well, that and all the people who get off on celebs having public meltdowns. Anyway, now that Britney’s got her own Vegas show, it’s even more important that she keeps that moneymaker of hers in shape. And judging from these latest leggings pictures, so far so good. Let’s hope she keeps it up, because screw the tabloids, I’ll take Hot Britney over Crazy Britney any day.
Since Vegas is pretty much the last stop in any celebrity’s career, we probably shouldn’t be too surprised that Britney Spears just started her own two year run at the Planet Hollywood in Vegas with a show called “Britney: Piece of Me.” And I guess she’s using the tour to kickstart her weight loss regimen. Judging from these pictures though, she’s still got a ways to go. So I’d hold off on buying tickets for a few months at least to give her time to work out all the kinks, and work off a few pounds. Still, dancing for four or five shows a day, seven days a week ought to do the trick — as long as she manages to stay away from those casino buffets, that is.
Well, this is kinda disappointing. As my regular readers know, Britney Spears has been in the middle of a serious hotness comeback lately. So I figured these pictures of her and her MILF cleavage would look a little better than this. As it turns out though, it may have all just been the product of good bras and Photoshop. So now I don’t know what to think. This is even worse than when I found out that Santa Claus wasn’t real. I’m still getting over that one, and it’s been a good 3 months already.