ARCHIVES > November, 2006
Hollywood party girl Lindsay Lohan is receiving alcohol counseling in a bid to stay sober, according to reports. The star was recently snapped sporting an Alcoholics Anonymous badge, and sources claim she visited a group therapy session with the organization in Los Angeles yesterday morning.
Poor Lindsay Lohan. It seems that the last few years of having to get up at the crack of noon for movie shoots, multi-million dollar paychecks and the general stress of having everything a person could possibly want by age 18 has driven her to drink. I don’t know what she’s doing wasting her time at AA meetings though. Just give me one week with the girl and I promise you she’ll be straight as an arrow when we’re done. I can also promise you she’ll be walking funny for a while too. Hey, my therapy isn’t free you know! Sheesh!
Actress Jessica Biel and Derek Jeter spent the weekend after Thanksgiving cozying up all over Las Vegas, according to New York newspapers and People.com. At the Tryst nightclub Saturday night, the pair snuck kisses at the VIP table they shared with Jeter’s Yankees teammates Alex Rodriguez and Jason Giambi.
It must be nice to be Derek Jeter. He’s captain of the NY Yankees. He’s won several World Series Championships. He makes millions of dollars. And, it seems that he’s managed to knock uglies with just about every hot assed starlet from Mariah Carey, to Jordana Brewster to Miss freakin’ Universe, Lara Dutta! Real rough life, let me tell you! As shitty as my life may be compared to his though, I always took comfort in the fact that neither him, nor I had ever seen Jessica Biel naked in person before. Checkmate Jeter, it seems you’ve bested me once again, and I hate you for it. Well have your fun with Jessica, see if I care. Let me just say this: As long as she’s by your side, your baseball career will fail miserably. Call it the Hollywood Tuna Curse. (Deliver Jessica to me, and I may lift it.)
First I would like to say that I don’t think much of Vida Guerra. For starters, she’s not that pretty and secondly her ass isn’t as perfect as the Photoshop wizards at FHM want you to believe it is. Now don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t kick her out of bed. I’m not crazy! I mean, would you give up the opportunity to have a booty like that as your personal pillow? Look at it! The thing has neck support and all. Hmm… but you may wanna double bag the pillow case.
Check out the rest of this photo shoot at FHM.com
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Christina Aguilera racked up a massive Ã‚Â£2,000 ($3,890 USD), bar bill while partying in London. The “˜Beautiful’ singer was enjoying an evening out at London’s trendy Kabarets Prophecy club and wasted no time in getting into the party spirit. However, Christina, 25, was later seen being carried out of the venue by her minders after apparently having one too many glasses of champagne.
Her unsteady exit was later blamed on exhaustion, rather than excessive drinking.
It cracks me up how these music celebrities have absolutely no shame performing in their underwear, flashing their crotches, making slutty music videos and partaking in a whole assortment of other activities you and I wouldn’t be caught dead doing. Yet when it comes to admitting they got shit-faced in a bar, they lie through their teeth to deny it. Christina Aguilera would have us believe she laid down nearly 4 grand in a club, had a few sips of booze, and then collapsed like a house of cards in a windstorm due to fatigue? C’mon! Admit it, Christina. You were drunker than a coalminer on payday, dancing on the bar, shaking your ass and having a blast. What’s so wrong with that? Isn’t that what 25 year old, millionaire babes are expected to do? Trust me, there’s no shame in getting loaded once in a while. Christina should consider herself lucky she wasn’t caught on film exiting a car without underwear like some people we know. Unfortunately, her luck is our loss. It’s only a matter of time though”¦.
The famous couple (Jordan and Peter Andre) have released a duets album today, November 27th. The album is entitled A whole new world and is a charity album with all proceedings going to their chosen charities due to the poor health condition of Jordan’s son Harvey.
Let me just start by saying I have nothing but respect for Jordan and her husband for donating the proceeds of her album to charity. I just wish they would have picked another medium to raise funds with. Couldn’t they have recorded a sex tape instead? Just think of how many sick kids could have been helped with the millions of dollars this video would have raised. Now think about the twenty-nine bucks and change they’re actually going to raise by selling this piece of shit album. After watching the first (and hopefully last) music video from the album, I honestly don’t think I’ve ever seen such a cheesy display. Not to mention the fact that the music itself has about as much soul as a frozen hockey puck. And to any of you fooled into thinking that Jordan can actually sing, watch her live performance here. Absolutely hilarious! Yes, a sex tape would have been much better. Jordan’s breasts are much more talented that her vocal chords.
|Jordan – A Whole New World Video|
When Hilary Duff stepped out last year with a long face, it wasn’t because the singer-actress was down in the dumps “” it was that her newly veneered teeth were too big for her mouth! “She probably had her teeth recontoured or reshaped to fit her smile,” says Apa of Hil’s smaller, narrower smile. “Now you look at her cute smile rather than focusing on her large teeth. She looks much prettier!”
When I first read this article the first thing that popped in my head was that maybe yesterday’s reports were untrue about Joel Madden being dumped by Hilary Duff. Maybe he was the one who actually did the dumping after she developed some bad, um, oral habits back when she wielded those big chompers (yeah, you know what I’m talking about)?
But that can’t be true. No way. No one in their right mind would ever dump Hilary — even if she is prone to using teeth. So here’s my theory about what really prompted the split: she tolerated her poseur boyfriend until she got her teeth fixed, and once she did, she realized she could do a lot better. And when I say “a lot better,” I’m talking about yours truly. In fact, as I type this I’m sitting by my phone waiting for Hilary‘s inevitable call. Yup, it’s great being me.
Mean Girls star Lindsay Lohan is taking shooting lessons ahead of her trip to war-torn Iraq. The movie actress, 20, actress will be visiting Iraq on Dec 6, to entertain the US troops deployed there, and claims knowing how to handle a gun is essential before that.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but while in Iraq, if it gets to the point where those gun lessons actually come in handy, I doubt firing straight will be at the top of Lindsay Lohan‘s concerns. I think the 50 Iraqi insurgents surrounding her and her dead security detail would take the top spot. If you ask me, freckly, large breasted party girls belong in war zones about as much as Kramer does speaking at an NAACP meeting.
Ha! Girls Getting Bikini Waxes (Horny Oyster)