Rihanna Takes a Shower in the ‘Bates Motel’ (Egotastic)
ARCHIVES > March, 2017
I really need to start learning Russian. And not just because it might land me a sweet government job — anyone know if there’s a Secretary of Blogging? But see, I also need to be able to talk to all these Russian InstaHotties I keep stumbling across. Anyway, here’s my latest discovery, Annet Reinen. And if anyone knows how to say “Will you sleep with me for a green card?” in Russian, it’d be much appreciated.
Looks like I may have spoke too soon when I said Sara Jean Underwood had found herself a new rich boyfriend/meal ticket. Because there’s only two reasons a hot nobody posts this many topless pictures online: A) to find herself a new sugar daddy and B) to get featured on Hollywood Tuna. So Sara’s one for two, at least.
I don’t know much about the business world, considering my “office” consists of a futon in my mom’s basement, but does anyone know if bloggers are allowed to claim workers’ comp? Because after checking out this latest round of lingerie booty goodness from Elsa Hosk, I’m pretty sure I’m going to be out of commission for the rest of the day. Yow!
Good news, my
fellow perverts loyal readers: turns out Madison Beer turned 18 a few weeks back, which means she’s not big trouble anymore. And more importantly, that you can start following her on Snapchat without worrying about the cops showing up. And trust me, with updates like this, you’re not going to want to miss another day. Enjoy.
Cheryl Burke Is The New Abby Lee Miller, For Now (DLISTED)
I’ve never been to Australia, mostly because as a blogger, I’m pretty sure I’m contractually obligated to spend at least 11 months of the year in my mom’s basement. But I might have to make an exception after seeing Lucie Jaid here. This is the first time I’ve come across the Aussie model, but she’s so damn hot, I’m pretty sure her Instagram should become the country’s new tourism campaign. I know I’m sold.
I know some of you guys might look at these shots of Bella Thorne sexy dancing and see just another future nobody doing whatever she possibly can to extend her 15 minutes a few seconds longer. But me? I see a true social media genius. And also a five-alarm pants fire. So whatever else she is doesn’t really matter. Enjoy.
I know, I know. Look, I’m just as surprised as you guys to be doing a post on Michelle Pfeiffer right now. Considering last I checked, it’s 2017 and not the early ’90s. But I just came across this photoshoot the actress did for Interview and had to double-check my calendar again. Because damn! I don’t know what kind of deal with the devil she had to strike to look this good at 58, but I bet more women consider it taking it after this.
I know some of you guys probably think I call Alexis Ren here my favorite Insta-hottie just because I’m trying to score a date with her. And that’s just not true. I’d also settle for a few personalized booty shots sent to my inbox… But until that magical day finally comes, I guess I’ll just have to make do with another round of her pants-melting Instagram shots. It’s tough, but I think I’ll manage.
Apparently it’s the 20th anniversary of Buffy the Vampire Slayer or something, because Entertainment Weekly just got the whole cast to reunite for a celebratory cover shoot: Sarah Michelle Gellar, Charisma Carpenter, Michelle Trachtenberg, and… all the other ones I don’t really care about. And for the most part, they’re still looking pretty good. Well, except for maybe Michelle. I don’t know what she’s been up to these past two decades, but I’m guessing it’s not hitting the gym. Too bad.
–Khloe Kardashian vs. WWE’s Lana?
–Hot celebs breaking a sweat!
– Carolina Lavinia belongs in a bikini
–Lindsay Lohan is a hot mess
–Scarlett Johansson leg show
–Kristen Bell is still hot
–Emily Ratajkowski burns my pants
–Alexis Ren knows how to tease
–Stephanie Rao will cause pant fires
–Dessie Mitcheson is so hot it hurts