Ok this is the final straw! It’s time for Jessica Simpson to dump John Mayer once and for all. If I was going out with Jessica, do you think I’d have her dress up like some unshaven 60’s flower child, then take pics of it? Hell no! I would have insisted her Daisy Duke costume was permanently underneath whatever outfit she had one, just in case we ended up on the beach, camera in hand. John Mayer doesn’t deserve to have a body like that, because he lacks vision – vision that I possess. Don’t get me started on the poses I’d have her strike while I snapped away on my trusty camera. Jess can keep kissing him all she wants, but I guarantee that toad will never turn into a prince.
April 9th, 2007