I was playing hockey the other day and got hit in the head with a puck and I think I might be slightly concussed, I feel like I’m hungover but I haven’t had any booze. What the hell? I’m going to have to self medicate with some shots of Kate Upton and her awesome supermodel body at some party last night. I feel better already. I’d feel even better with those big beautiful breasts massaging the back of my neck. Call me.

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