Honestly, this Michelle Hunziker woman really doesn’t do anything other than hang out on the beach in very small European bathing suits. I love it. Obviously she’s got some money to be able to afford to do this kind of thing, so I’m sure she needs an assistant. Someone who can help her pick out her bikinis, find her a good spot on the beach away from all the douchebags and make sure she’s covered every inch of that tight body of hers with sunscreen. Where do I apply?

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