Here’s Katie Price proudly showing off her latest award, for “17 Years of Continuous Service to Masturbation.” Congratulations Katie, the prestigious honor’s well-deserved. And long overdue. I didn’t even know someone handed these things out. But now I can’t wait to get mine, maybe for Hollywood Tuna’s next anniversary. I’ve already got an acceptance speech all planned out: I’d like to thank Katie and all the other girls who made this dream a reality.