After flying around the world to do seven shows in seven days, I’m glad to see that Rihanna‘s taking a well-deserved break. And I’m even more glad to see some intrepid perv with a camera was there to capture every minute of Rihanna walking around in a bikini and drinking a beer. Riveting stuff. Anyway, if Rihanna still needs to unwind after this, I’d be happy to come over and give her one of my world-famous massages. I focus primarily on the major trouble spots: the chest and below the belt. I’m told it’s very relaxing.