Just a heads up, you’re probably going to want to make sure you’ve got some water or a fire extinguisher nearby before you check out this latest set of bikini pictures from Alyssa Miller. Because trust me, they’re so hot, it’s not going to take long before you start burning up. And I don’t want to get anybody fired for suggesting you take your pants off at work. It’s probably a lot easier to just pretend you dumped an entire bottle of water on your lap by accident.
I’m pretty sure Alyssa Miller is still single these days, although if she keeps doing crazy-hot photoshoots like this one, she probably won’t be for much longer. So I think it’s time for the two of us to stop denying our obvious connection and make this relationship happen. I mean, it’s a win-win: I get to date a super-hot model, and she gets to date a pasty blogger and get a bunch more exposure on this site. Hmm… OK, so maybe that’s more of a win-draw, but still. I’m game if she is.
So you probably figured as much, but for some reason I still haven’t been able to successfully convince Alyssa Miller to go out with me yet. Probably because she remains completely unaware of my existence. But not to worry, because Alyssa isn’t a household name yet either, which means I still have something to offer her in exchange: exposure. And I figure if I just keep posting ridiculously hot lingerie photoshoots of the SI model like this one here, one of those two goals is bound to come true eventually. Most likely the household name one, but hey, you never know. A guy can dream.
Good news, guys: looks like Alyssa Miller has played out her 6-month contract as Jake Gyllenhaal’s “girlfriend” and now the SI model is officially back on the market again. So I figure it’s time to make my move. Sure, I may not be a big-name actor, but I can offer Alyssa way more exposure than being “caught” holding hands with a movie star by the paparazzi ever could. All I need her to do is send me a few more great lingerie shoots like this a month, and Alyssa will be a household name in no time. That’s the Tuna guarantee.
Irina Shayk, Elsa Hosk, Alyssa Miller, Karolina Kurkova, Maryna Linchuk And Alina Baikova Will Make You Want To Donate!
In what’s got to be the best cross-promotion in the history of charity events, some organization called Gabrielle’s Angel Foundation hosted an “Angel Ball” and invited a whole bunch of Victoria’s Secret Angels and models, including Irina Shayk, Elsa Hosk, Alyssa Miller, Karolina Kurkova, Maryna Linchuk, and Alina Baikova, to come and help raise some money. I don’t know about you guys, but one look at all the supermodel cleavage on display here and I’m ready to get out my check book. How much for the entire set?
Go ahead and enjoy these bikini pictures of SI model Alyssa Miller for few minutes, because I’m afraid I’ve got some disappointing news. Apparently Alyssa is “dating” Jake Gyllenhaal these days. I’m not sure when their contract runs out and this bikini hottie becomes a free agent again, but whenever that happens, I plan on making my sales pitch. I may not be a big movie star or anything, but I can offer Alyssa way more exposure. And I didn’t want to go this far, but I’ll even thrown in a bunch of Burger King coupons to sweeten the deal. Think it over, Alyssa.
Today’s extra catch consists of Stacy Keibler, Petra Nemcova, Alyssa Miller, Shanina Shaik, Nicole Trunfio, Katy Perry, Juliana Hough, Carla Gugino, Lynette Corolla, Francesca Eastwood, Aisleyne Horgan-Wallace, Claire Sinclair, Kristin Cavallari, Daisy Fuentes, Emma Stone, Olivia Wilde.
Today’s extra catch consists of Alyssa Milano, Selena Gomez, Pixie Geldof, Julianne Hough, Elsa Hosk, Alyssa Miller, Emmy Rossum, Lindsay Ellingson, Erin Heatherton, Martha Hunt, Nicole Trunfio, Giada De Laurentiis, Sylvie van der Vaart, Cara Santana, Naya Rivera, Kelley Jakle, Stephy C, Melanie Brown.
Because the only thing better than one swimsuit model is six of them, here’s a good half-dozen of this year’s Sports Illustrated swimsuit models celebrating the new Swimsuit Issue at Caesars Palace in Vegas. There’s Alyssa Miller, Cintia Dicker, Emily DiDonato, Genevieve Morton, Jessica Gomes, and Nina Agdal. I hope the place took odds on how many bachelor parties struck out with these six throughout the night. I’d take the over.
So apparently there were competing movie premieres happening last night, and judging by the respective guest lists, I’m calling it already: Parker won. Sure, all I’ve got to go on are these pictures of Sports Illustrated swimsuit model Alyssa Miller, but what more do you need? You just can’t beat classy supermodel cleavage. It’s a scientifically-proven fact. Trust me, I’ve done years of research.