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Bella Thorne’s Money Shot In A Bikini

March 23rd, 2017

Bella Thorne

Bella Thorne is a genius when it comes to social media whoring. She does the same sh%t daily and each and every time she manages to get me to post her crap. Here she is pretending she’s on the receiving end of a money shot while showering in a bikini. Brilliant!

         
Bella Thorne Pictures Bella Thorne Pictures    

Emily Ratajkowski Roughing It

March 23rd, 2017

Emily Ratajkowski

Emily Ratajkowski is one of those models who is just popular because she got naked in a very racy music video, but I wonder where she’d be if that video never happened? Probably Playboy Cyber girl. Anyway, here are her latest Instagram posts and Snaps. Enjoy.

         
Emrata Emrata Emrata Emrata Emrata
Emrata Emrata Emrata Emrata Emrata

Maggie Rawlins Belongs In A Bikini

March 21st, 2017

Maggie Rawlins

I never heard of Maggie Rawlins, but here she is modeling for Beach Bunny Swimwear. Obviously she is hot, but she looks like every other model on Instagram, which makes me wonder how much do these chicks actually earn when they are all so interchangeable. Back in the day we had a handful of top models, but now with social media every swimwear or fashion company can hire a chick for peanuts. Anyway, let’s forget about the economics of being a model, it’s not important and let’s focus on those titties. Amen.

» view all 29 photos

         
Maggie Rawlins Pictures Maggie Rawlins Pictures Maggie Rawlins Pictures Maggie Rawlins Pictures Maggie Rawlins Pictures
Maggie Rawlins Pictures Maggie Rawlins Pictures Maggie Rawlins Pictures Maggie Rawlins Pictures Maggie Rawlins Pictures

Rachel Mortenson Will Blow Your Pants Off

March 21st, 2017

Rachel Mortenson

It already feels like summer out there, so what better way to celebrate than with pictures of a smoking hot busty blonde in a bikini? And yes, I know that’s how I like to celebrate pretty much everything, from birthdays to Tuesdays, but whatever. Just shut up and enjoy this latest killer bikini photoshoot from Rachel Mortenson.

 Rachel Mortenson  Rachel Mortenson  Rachel Mortenson  Rachel Mortenson
 Rachel Mortenson  Rachel Mortenson
 Rachel Mortenson  Rachel Mortenson

Vita Sidorkina Because She Is Amazing

March 20th, 2017

Vita Sidorkina

You want hot! I’ve got hot for you. Russian sensation Vita Sidorkina. I don’t know much about her, but I do know in Russian “Vita” means tug and “Sidorkina” means Kielbasa. Who would name their daughter that? Crazy world we live in.

         
Vita Sidorkina Vita Sidorkina Vita Sidorkina Vita Sidorkina Vita Sidorkina
Vita Sidorkina Vita Sidorkina Vita Sidorkina Vita Sidorkina  
Vita Sidorkina      

Raiding Ryan Newman’s Instagram And Snapchat

March 14th, 2017

Ryan Newman

I’ve done a couple posts on Ryan Newman before, but I’m guessing you perverts probably aren’t as up-to-date on your C-list “celebrities” as I am. So here’s a quick refresher: Ryan here’s a professional “actress,” and also a wannabe model and pretend singer. And I guess now we can add professional InstaHottie to the list, because this girl’s social media game is so hot, it should come with a flammable warning or something. Yow!

» view all 21 photos

Ryan Newman Ryan Newman Ryan Newman Ryan Newman Ryan Newman
Ryan Newman Ryan Newman Ryan Newman Ryan Newman Ryan Newman

Alexis Ren’s Little Booty Action

February 17th, 2017

Alexis Ren

Here’s my new favorite Insta-hottie Alexis Ren back with another pants-melting beach photoshoot. And I just hope Emily Ratajkowski is paying attention here, because I don’t care how many tens of millions of followers you’ve got. Everyone knows that the true measure of success for an Instagram supermodel is how many phone screens you burn out from all the scrolling. And thanks to Alexis, I’m already on my third of the month. Yow!

» view all 17 photos

Alexis Ren Alexis Ren Alexis Ren Alexis Ren Alexis Ren
Alexis Ren Alexis Ren Alexis Ren Alexis Ren Alexis Ren

Vita Sidorkina Is My Fave

February 15th, 2017

Vita Sidorkina

Every year I try to tell Sports Illustrated who should make the cover of their Swimsuit Issue, and every year, they ignore me and get it wrong. This time, I was really pulling for Vita Sidorkina here (get your mind out of the gutter, perverts), and personally, I think it’s pretty obvious why she should’ve been picked. I mean, just look at these pictures! No offense to Kate Upton, but she looks like a sack of potatoes next to Vita. Is it too late to change it?

» view all 19 photos

Vita Sidorkina Vita Sidorkina Vita Sidorkina Vita Sidorkina
Vita Sidorkina Vita Sidorkina Vita Sidorkina Vita Sidorkina
Vita Sidorkina Vita Sidorkina

Chrissy Teigen Does Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue

February 15th, 2017

Chrissy Teigen

Looking at these pictures of Chrissy Teigen in the 2017 SI Swimsuit Issue just reminded me, but I totally forgot Chrissy had a kid last year. Which means it’s time to invite her to join the official Hollywood Tuna MILF Club. It’s a pretty sweet deal, actually — you get to pretend I don’t exist while I talk about what a hot MILF you are, and club dues are just a few bikini and/or lingerie and/or fully nude pictures sent to my inbox once a month. Or, for a lifetime membership, you come over to my mom’s basement for a date. No one’s picked that option yet, but maybe Chrissy could be the first. (It’s cool. Just tell John it’s a “work thing.”)

» view all 13 photos

Chrissy Teigen Chrissy Teigen Chrissy Teigen
Chrissy Teigen Chrissy Teigen Chrissy Teigen Chrissy Teigen
Chrissy Teigen Chrissy Teigen Chrissy Teigen

Kate Upton Is The 2017 ‘Sports Illustrated’ Swimsuit Issue Cover Model

February 15th, 2017

After weeks of those super-hot teaser videos, the 2017 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue has finally been released, and Kate Upton got the cover — again. That makes it three times for the busty blonde. And to celebrate, they apparently made three different covers so you can “collect them all” or something. But since no one would actually ever do that, I’ve got all three for you here, so you can enjoy them all without looking like a big weirdo for buying an armful of the same damn magazine. You’re welcome in advance.

» view all 19 photos

Kate Upton Pictures Kate Upton Pictures Kate Upton Pictures Kate Upton Pictures Kate Upton Pictures
Kate Upton Pictures Kate Upton Pictures Kate Upton Pictures Kate Upton Pictures Kate Upton Pictures

Hannah Davis’ Sexy Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue Teaser

February 14th, 2017

Hannah Davis

Ugh. I guess Hannah Davis is going by Hannah Jeter now. At least, judging by this Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue teaser video they just released. But that’s not even the worst part. See, I just found out her and that loser ex-ballplayer are having a kid. So make sure to take a good look at Hannah’s killer bikini body here, because it might be the last one we see for a while. What a shame. She had so much potential too.

» view all 13 photos

Hannah Davis Hannah Davis
Hannah Davis Hannah Davis
Hannah Davis Hannah Davis
Hannah Davis Hannah Davis
Hannah Davis Hannah Davis

Josephine Skriver Belongs In A Bikini

February 14th, 2017

Josephine Skriver

Since I’m such a good guy (stop laughing, I haven’t gotten to the jokes yet), I figured I’d get my loyal readers something nice for Valentine’s Day: like this brand-new set of bikini pictures from supermodel/total pants fire Josephine Skriver. And actually, if you’re ever stuck for a present, this works for pretty much every occasion, birthdays, Christmas, housewarming parties. So enjoy, and you’re welcome.

» view all 23 photos

Josephine Skriver Pictures Josephine Skriver Pictures Josephine Skriver Pictures Josephine Skriver Pictures Josephine Skriver Pictures
Josephine Skriver Pictures Josephine Skriver Pictures Josephine Skriver Pictures Josephine Skriver Pictures Josephine Skriver Pictures

Emily DiDonato’s Sexy Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue Teaser

February 13th, 2017

Emily DiDonato

According to this latest Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue teaserEmily DiDonato is going to take us to “a field of dreams” in this video. And I’ve gotta admit, watching Emily roll around topless in some field is pretty close to my actual dreams. There’s only a couple key differences: 1) Emily’s usually joined by a few other SI supermodels, and 2) the whole thing never lasts even close to a 1 minute 44, like it does in this video. We’re talking maybe 30, 45 seconds max.

» view all 11 photos

Emily DiDonato Emily DiDonato
Emily DiDonato Emily DiDonato
Emily DiDonato Emily DiDonato
Emily DiDonato Emily DiDonato
Emily DiDonato Emily DiDonato

Rich Kid Wannabe Model Ava Sambora Works It In A Bikini

February 13th, 2017

Ava Sambora

I know I usually like to rag on rich kid models and point out how they’re only landing modeling contracts because of their famous parents. But let’s get real here: Heather Locklear and Richie Sambora aren’t exactly A-listers anymore, and Galore Magazine isn’t Vogue. So instead of getting cynical about this latest beach photoshoot from Ava Sambora, let’s just enjoy it for what it is: more pictures of another hot nobody/wannabe in a bikini. And those always work for me.

Ava Sambora Ava Sambora Ava Sambora Ava Sambora
Ava Sambora Ava Sambora Ava Sambora
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