Last time I did a post on Miley Cyrus, she was flashing her bra on Instagram just like the good old days. But I guess she must really be committed to this whole wannabe hippie makeover of hers (or at least her agent/manager is), because here’s Miley on the cover of Harper’s Bazaar going full flower child. And I don’t know about you guys, but I’ve had enough of this lame wholesome act. I think it’s time we start a petition to bring back the old Miley. Who’s with me?
I know Miley Cyrus has been a little boring lately, and believe me, no one’s more upset about that than me and the Little Tuna. But you know that saying “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks”? Well, I guess it turns out you also can’t teach an old attention wh%re to stop showing off her funbags on the Internet. And thank God for that.
Now that Miley Cyrus is doing her whole “wholesome” country girl act these days, it’s been a while since we’ve gotten any real hotness from one of my former favorite attention whores. So I don’t know about you guys, but it’s great to see Miley finally showing off her puppies for the camera again. And no, I’m not talking about those cute pooches. Enjoy.
I don’t know what kind of quarterlife crisis or whatever Miley Cyrus is going through right now, but I for one am definitely not digging this whole hipster flower child look she’s got going on these days. I miss the old Miley. You know, the one that used to hit the clubs in nothing but nipple pasties and booty shorts. Anyway, in case you need a reminder of those glory days, I included a couple shots from 2013, back when Miley was headed in the right direction, instead of down this dangerous path. You’re welcome.
OK, so this one is a little tricky for me. In case you didn’t hear, Miley Cyrus and Ariana Grande performed as part of a big, star-studded charity benefit concert for Manchester last night, and it’s a little tough to make jokes about that, because it’s a great cause. It’s also difficult, because every time I try to whip out the Little Tuna, they cut to a shot of someone in the audience tearing up. And normally I don’t cry until afterwards. So I don’t know, maybe we should just move it along?
I was all ready to start complaining about Miley Cyrus and her cleaned-up new image. I barely even recognized her in her last photoshoot. But then I saw this picture of Miley doing one of her classic poses for the camera: the old tongue-action-and-cleavage-show look and unless that was just a Throwback Thursday pic, I’m glad to see there’s at least still some of the old Miley left.
OK, so I know that Miley Cyrus is doing her best to convince us all that she’s “changed” for some reason. Which I don’t really get, because I always loved Miley and her topless, attention-seeking tongue action. But hey, whatever helps you sell records to Middle America, I guess. Anyway, here’s the video for her new single “Malibu,” and I’m happy to report that it’s still got something in there for us fans of the old Miley, like a couple booty shots and some underboob action. I’m glad to see at least some things never change. Phew.
I’ve been wondering why we haven’t been seeing Miley Cyrus do any of her usual tongue action and topless routine lately, and now I know why. See, according to this Billboard cover, Miley’s “left behind the pasties” and pot so she can become a singer-songwriter and heal the nation. I don’t think that’s supposed to be a joke, but go ahead and laugh, because that’s one of the funniest things I’ve heard in months. Anyway, I guess that’s why these pictures are so tame (for her). Here’s hoping this is just a phase she grows out of.
I was missing Miley Cyrus‘ tongue action, but looks like she has taken it to a new level and added a twist to it. Or should I say a bend. Girl is mighty flexible and this is further proof that she would probably make a better porn star than singer. Actually, in these days, most of the females singers out there would make better porn stars. I can’t tell the difference anymore.
I just realized why Miley Cyrus hasn’t been doing any of her usual naked photoshoots or sexy tongue action recently… I’m pretty sure that now that she’s a judge on The Voice, people must be telling her she has to settle down and behave. And that’s total BS, as far as I’m concerned. I mean, c’mon. What do you think is going to get better ratings: this lame promotional photoshoot where Miley’s all covered up or this one where she’s licking the floor while topless? I rest my case.
OK, so I know this isn’t exactly the type of photoshoot we’re used to seeing from Miley Cyrus, but listen, it’s Variety, not Terry Richardson. Which means no topless pictures and/or those dreaded black censored bars. But hey, when it comes to Miley, I’ll take what I can get. And at least she’s actually looking hot and giving us a peek at that sexy stomach of hers here, instead of wearing footie pajamas or whatever other weird-ass stoner outfits she’s always going out in. So enjoy. I know I will.
I know it’s been a while since we’ve gotten any new Miley Cyrus hotness, but good news: everyone’s favorite pop star got back on Instagram for some new bikini pictures and tongue action. So here she is posing with a cute pooch and a pig, and if Miley loves animals so much, how about posing with the Little Tuna next time? Call me!
So according to my sources, the big news here is that Miley Cyrus is supposedly wearing her engagement ring in these pictures, which I guess is a sign that she’s back with the less-famous Hemsworth brother again. But personally, I’m way more concerned with what Miley isn’t wearing here — aka a see-through shirt or nipple pasties or any of those other great outfits we’re used to seeing on her. Here’s hoping it’s just a phase and Miley isn’t going normal on us now that she’s engaged (again). Now that’d be worth getting worked up over.
Here’s why Miley Cyrus is hands down my #1 favorite pop star and always will be: because while all those other young hotties out there like Taylor Swift or Selena Gomez are busy worrying about their “brand” and projecting the right public image, Miley is posing for “artsy” black-and-white photoshoots where she licks a hardwood floor while topless. And you know, on the off-chance this whole music thing doesn’t work out for Miley, I think she could have a great second career as a maid… I know I’d hire her to clean my floors. Yow.