Rachel Mortenson was a big thing before Instagram, however she jumped on the social media bandwagon a little too late and has only 67K followers. For an Instagram model, that is below average. I’m hoping that this post catapults her into the millions because that’s what she is worth IMO. So let’s make it happen. And Rachel thank me in a few weeks. You’re welcome.
I like to call Rachel Mortenson here my dream girl, and this latest photoshoot is definitely a great example why. See, not only is this busty lingerie model an absolute knockout, but the only way I’ll ever come within 5 feet of her is on my computer screen or in my dreams. Speaking of which, I think I need to go take a quick nap while these pictures are still fresh. Be right back.
Here’s Rachel Mortenson back with another killer lingerie shoot for Frederick’s of Hollywood, and it reminded me that it’s been a while since we’ve gotten any new hotness from my busty dream girl. But maybe that’s not such a bad thing after all. Because I don’t know about you guys, but my pants region is probably going to need a few months to recover after a set of lingerie pictures this hot. Yow!
I’m pretty sure there’s some serious Photoshop magic going on in this latest lingerie shoot my dream girl Rachel Mortenson did for Frederick’s of Hollywood… And just to be clear, I don’t mean with her body, because that definitely doesn’t need any touching up. I mean because this lingerie is clearly see-through, and I’m 99% sure that Rachel isn’t the world’s first nipple-less model. I think I would’ve heard about that. But I guess it’s probably for the best anyway, because otherwise, these pictures probably would’ve blown my pants right off, and I’ve already got two strikes at this Starbucks.
You might want to make sure you’ve got a fire extinguisher handy, because here’s something guaranteed to start a five-alarm pants fire: new bikini pictures from my dream girl Rachel Mortenson. And feel free to take a page from my playbook — I always take my pants off ahead of time. Sure, it means I’m not allowed to go into coffee shops or my local library anymore, but it’s a lot better than burning through your only pair of sweats. Enjoy.
Here’s former Hooters Dream Girl and current Tuna dream girl Rachel Mortenson back with another busty lingerie photoshoot. Although I have to say, in my dreams, Rachel was wearing a whole lot less. And also, my hottie 11th grade English teacher was there. But I guess this is still a pretty good approximation. So you guys enjoy these while I go lay down and try to find out what happens next.
This is only my second ever post on Rachel Mortenson, but the former Hooters Dream Girl is already quickly becoming one of my new favorite no-name hotties. First it was an epic set of lingerie pictures, now it’s this sexy bikini photoshoot for Frederick’s of Hollywood. That’s right, Rachel’s a true double-threat: she looks just as awesome in a bikini as she does in lingerie. Now the only thing left I guess is seeing how good she looks wearing only my sheets. It’s the true test for any up-and-coming model, and so far no one’s passed it yet. Probably because I still haven’t been able to convince anyone to actually try it.
I can’t believe I’ve never done a post on this Rachel Mortenson chick before. With a body this good, you’d think I would’ve proposed to her via Twitter 10 times by now. But better late than never I guess. So you guys go ahead and enjoy this awesome collection of lingerie and sexy costume pictures from the former Hooters Dream Girl. I have to go get my tux cleaned and my Twitter account ready for my big day.