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Bad Blood Is The Hottest Video Of All-time

May 18th, 2015

I know music videos aren’t as big of a deal as they used to be, but they might as well just stop making them entirely from now, because Taylor Swift just made the greatest one of all-time with “Bad Blood.” It’s got cameos from a whole bunch of hotties like Lily Aldridge, Zendaya, Hayley Williams, Gigi Hadid, Karlie Kloss, Jessica Alba, Martha Hunt, Ellen Pompeo, Cara Delevingne, Cindy Crawford, and Selena Gomez. And I’m going to have to watch it a few hundred more times just to make sure I didn’t miss anyone.

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Taylor Swift Pictures Taylor Swift Pictures Taylor Swift Pictures Taylor Swift Pictures Taylor Swift Pictures

Selena Gomez Is A Cute Little Chunkster

May 12th, 2015

Selena Gomez

Look, I know I’ve been a little rough on Selena Gomez lately, and calling her a “chunkster” probably isn’t helping. But hey, even though she’s put on a few pounds, she’s still a cute chunkster. Besides, I’m sure Selena could work the weight off in no time if she just put her mind to it and got on my Tuna exercise plan. Trust me, just thinking about doing 30-45 seconds of “cardio” with yours truly is enough to make any hottie lose their appetite.

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Photos: PacificCoastNews

Selena Gomez Is Naked In Bed And Can’t Sleep

May 11th, 2015

Selena Gomez posted this video from bed on her Instagram and while unfortunately it’s not the video us fans perverts have been waiting for, there’s still a couple interesting takeaways from it: one, that she sleeps naked and two, that she has trouble sleeping sometimes. Luckily for Selena, I’ve got a patented method for falling asleep. It involves 30-45 seconds of vigorous exercise, and I’m out like a light afterwards. And I’d be more than happy to record it for her. My phone takes great video.

A video posted by Selena Gomez (@selenagomez) on

I Never Thought I’d Say This, But Selena Gomez Looks Better With Clothes On!

May 1st, 2015

Selena Gomez

I have a feeling I might get some angry emails for this, but here’s Selena Gomez attending some charity event called We Day, and after those pictures of Selena looking a little chunky in a swimsuit last month, I think I might actually prefer her wearing clothes. Which is a sad day for us all. So, speaking of charity, I’d be happy to help Selena get on an exercise plan free of charge. It involves 30 seconds of vigorous cardio with an out-of-shape blogger 3 days a week (maybe 45 if we’re going for a new personal best). And just think of how many lives we could improve. Starting with mine.

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Photos: WENN.com

Selena Gomez’s Chunky Swimsuit Pictures

April 17th, 2015

Selena Gomez

Look, I love Selena Gomez as much as the next pervert with a working set of eyes, but I first noticed a few months back that Selena was starting to put on a few pounds. And don’t let the killer cleavage in these new swimsuit pictures distract you, she’s definitely gotten chubbier — here’s proof. Hmm, actually, on second thought, you might want to go ahead and distract yourself with Selena’s cleavage after all. It’s the only spot where I don’t mind that she’s gotten a little bigger.

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Selena Gomez Swimsuit Pics For Her Fans

April 10th, 2015

Selena Gomez

Because I’m a pro, I was doing some very important “research” earlier, when I came across these: a pair of seriously hot swimsuit pictures that Selena Gomez exclusively shared with yours truly (and, you know, another 27 million of her followers). And now I get to share them with you perverts. So there, it turns out obsessively creeping hotties’ Instagrams all day does pay off. Who’s wasting their life now, Mom? Just wait until I finally get that Pulitzer.

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Selena Gomez Does Adidas Good

March 3rd, 2015

Selena Gomez

Here’s Selena Gomez back with another sexy photoshoot for Adidas, and as much as I’m digging the shots, I still don’t get whose bright idea it was to make Selena a spokesmodel. And I don’t really get how these pictures are supposed to help sell more shoes. Sweatpants, maybe. Or Kleenex. Or Costco-sized tubs of hand lotion. I don’t know about you guys, but I’m going to have to restock on all three after this. But hey, at least somebody’s making money off this, right?

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Selena Gomez Pictures Selena Gomez Pictures Selena Gomez Pictures
Selena Gomez Pictures Selena Gomez Pictures
Selena Gomez Pictures

Selena Gomez Topless In V Magazine

February 17th, 2015

Well, it’s about time Selena Gomez starts taking off her clothes, but after seeing these pictures her topless in the the latest V Magazine issue, I feel like I might get arrested for posting them. According to Wikipedia she is 22, but now I want to see her driver’s licence for proof. I feel like this a trap!

         
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Selena Gomez’s Juicy Booty Goodness

January 30th, 2015

Looks like we’re going to start getting daily updates from the set of Selena Gomez‘s new movie, and that’s good news, but it’s going to allow me to keep tabs on her weight. And since this is the first good look we’re getting at Selena’s booty, I’m happy to report that even though it’s a little thicker than I remembered, it’s still looking very healthy. Although I’d have to do a hands-on examination to know for sure. But if that’s not covered by Selena’s healthcare, I’d be happy to do it on the house. The well-being of her booty is very important. Especially for me and the Little Tuna.

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Selena Gomez Pictures Selena Gomez Pictures Selena Gomez Pictures Selena Gomez Pictures

Photos: Fameflynet

Selena Gomez Is A Cute Chubby Hitchhiker

January 29th, 2015

Selena Gomez

Here’s Selena Gomez back on set filming her new movie The Revised Fundamentals of Caregiving, whatever the hell that means. Only this time we’re getting a peek at her stomach as she tries to hitchhike. And I don’t know, she’s still looking a little chubby if you ask me. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’d definitely still give her a ride. I just don’t think that 30-45 seconds of cardio will make much of a difference.

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Photos: Fameflynet

Selena Gomez Is Looking A Little Chubby

January 28th, 2015

Selena Gomez

I don’t know what happened to Selena Gomez, but here she is on set of her movie ‘The Revised Fundamentals of Caregiving’ and not only is she smoking, she looks like she has gained a few extra lbs. Not saying she looks bad, but I’m concerned that if this continues there’s going to be a shortage of pantfires in the Tuna household.

         
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Selena Gomez Pictures Selena Gomez Pictures Selena Gomez Pictures Selena Gomez Pictures Selena Gomez Pictures

Photos: Fameflynet

Selena Gomez And Gigi Hadid Make A Great Pair

January 2nd, 2015

Selena Gomez GiGi Hadid

I never knew that Selena Gomez and one of my new favorite models GiGi Hadid were friends before, but here they are ringing in the New Year together and kicking off 2015 right: by giving me one hell of a lesbian fantasy to take into the new year. In fact, I know it’s only Day 2 of 365, but I think we might as well call it right now. Because I just don’t see how it’s getting any better than this. So ladies and gentlemen, here’s your official frontrunner for Fantasy of the Year. Enjoy.

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Selena Gomez Is Getting Chubby

December 29th, 2014

Selena Gomez

These past couple months, I’ve been loving the new and improved Selena Gomez and all the hotness she’s been dropping (and I know I’m not the only one). But I’ve gotta say, she’s looking a little chubby in these shots. I guess she had too much to eat over Christmas. So just to make sure this doesn’t get out of control, I think Selena’s New Year’s resolution should be to go on the patented Tuna exercise regimen: 30-45 seconds of cardio with yours truly 5 times a week. I’ll even give her the first couple sessions on the house as a Christmas present.

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Selena Gomez Pictures Selena Gomez Pictures Selena Gomez Pictures Selena Gomez Pictures

Photos: PacificCoastNews

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